Monday, June 27, 2016


I used to dream to pursue higher education in Massachusetts Institute of Technology, I used to daydream all the time about it, wondering how does it feel to be in there. But now, i have to forget about all of it. I still have a little thought about it, i have chill everytime i'm thinking about it. But i think that, maybe MIT is just not for me. Or, i was too scared to go there.

So i had to accept that i had to go to continue my study to ITB. Not a bad choice, it's a very good choice actually. Bandung Institute of Technology is ranked 361-370 in QS World University ranking. And, it's the best engineering university in Indonesia. It's very hard to get admitted in there. And also, lot of the alumnus are a very influenced people. Indonesian first president, Ir. Soekarno, graduated from ITB in 1926. And also B.J. Habibie, who also graduated from ITB. But still i am not very satisfied with it.

It's probably because, i think that i have picked the wrong major. Yeah, i was forced by the circumstances, i didn't have any other choices, and i was not brave enough to choose what i've always wanted.

But maybe this is the best choice after all, i've prayed to Allah so hard, looking for guidance, and this is the very final answer. Yeah, there's nothing to regret now.

After all, life is a one long ride with full of surprises. We don't know what exactly what's gonna happen, but i hope Allah has planned the best for us :)

Monday, May 2, 2016

Those two colors that will determine my life.

On that day, i will wake up in the morning, eagerly. I will be freaking out, i will be stressed out, or maybe i will be ignorant, having prepared for the worst case. But no matter how ignorant i will be, that painful feeling will still be there, untill then...
Seconds will feel like an hour, minutes will be like days, and the world will spin slower, as i wait for the server to come up.
And then it finally come up.
And then i will open my notebook, log in to that website, and then the thrill begins...
What color would appear in that small text box, would it be red, or would it be green?
If it's green : I will be thankful and very excited because, i will be admitted in thr best engineering college in this country. But, have i made the right decision? Is the decision i've chosen the right decision? It's like this, I have a crush on someone, i really love her, but i know that she's too pretty for me so i forget about her instead and move on to another girl. But still, the love that i had to my true crush still there...
If it's red : It will be VERY FRUSTRATING because i will have to study for that exam and i'm not really sure that i can pass that exam. But, if it's red, i will still have the chance to chase 'my true crush' and yeah, pursue my real passion.
But i can still try to love my 'new crush' because maybe my 'new crush' is better than my so called 'true love'. I input that decision not based on nothing. But i have asked my parents, my teacher, my student advisor, and i have prayed to Allah and maybe it is the best decision for me. :)
After all, it is up to Allah. We, humans have nothing, and we are just Allah's property. And i know that Allah has many of surprises for us, and Allah has prepared the best for us. :)